harmonize

now i thought and i said to the lord, what do all these aquaintances, friendships,relationships one has had in life at some point of time, mean, if they become so meaningless and so divergent ...... to the point that there exists no common ground of shared interests anymore, no decent conversation more than a hi- bye is possible, i mean i agree that these were not the perfect relationships they were more of like time pass and like travellers in a long-long journey, i guess, but then what causes this ackwardness, i think that is the question i asked the lord, when i sort of complained to him,

i thought it's better to ignore them than do this totally unnatural hi-bye thing, c'mmon we've had a lot more of shared life, shared interests be it in anything as trivial as porn or cricket or movies or studies and thus still were, of some decent interaction in life at that point of time.The cruelty of time is how i saw it , i do not know how to establish or re-establish these old relationships,

or do i need to move on to newer places newer people newer grounds is that what something's telling me, or is it, that the mistake i thought was that of time is actually mine, like may be in the way i look at these things

or is it the financial uncertainty i live in under the preent circumstances and that i have to put my financial, material life on stable grounds and then may be i will get a proper perspective of these,

i mean some of these friends are married and they got kids settled, and am kind of feelin like an alien trying some wierd stuff in life, with an enthusiastic optimism . this cruel hi - bye thing, i mean i dont understand this. what's the truth perspective of this, it's something lord, i would like to experince in life,

my guess is i will understand and be more confident among my old friends once i get this financial stability. i agree and i take responsibilty for this acwardness in aquaintances and relationships, may be my friends could play more proactive role in getting rid of this ackwardness or i dont know man but something better can happen in life than this hi-bye thing.

a little more understanding of each others' life and a natural harmony as a result of it. lord man it is my humble request to you to set this part of my life , right, in order with the truth, along with the all things that are being worked out. lord make me more confident and make me independant,[ ha-ha and this is independence day!!] lord i love you and i trust you. Om Namo Bhagawate. the day the light was born again on August 15.